One "hobby" I tend to have is being fairly obsessed with reading up on immersing myself in one topic at a time. At various times the running topic has been chronically ill children (which got way too depressing with my personal life), natural birth, breastfeeding, attachment parenting, feminism, racism, reproductive health, etc. About a month ago I found a new interest in reading about those who had escaped various fundamentalist Christian groups and families.
I cannot quite explain why I find this so important. I did not come from one of these kinds of groups. I grew up in a fairly mainstream Christian household. I went to public school and was expected to go to college. I was allowed to believe that God created the world through evolutionary mechanisms. I wore jeans. I was allowed to go on dates. I absolutely cannot begin to comprehend what abused individuals have experienced coming out of the more patriarchal sects.
However, some of the experiences I read about do resonate with me. For example, while my family demonstrated a fairly egalitarian marriage, I read all the pop Christian literature as a teenager and gave me some very negative views of women. I experienced a number of times where real problems were dismissed with supernatural solutions: "just pray" "it will all work out" "give it to God"
I was really inspired the other day by Libby Anne's post here. I had a similar experience where at one point, everything snapped and I do not have the same faith that I used to. Its been a very emotional process and I still have not really "come out" as an atheist yet. (That still feels like such a dirty word to say out loud)
I have gotten so much insight from sharing stories of those who have come out of more oppressive Christian movements (whether still of the faith or not) that I am going to try to resurrect my blog, as less of a perfectionist this time. I'm going to let go and share what is in my head.